Marry Me, Today and Everyday

{The Ceremony}

When I was growing up I would sit in mass with my family and imagine myself on my wedding day. I knew I was supposed to be "talking to Jesus", but as I knelt I couldn't help but dream about the day I would have my dad escort me down that long peach carpeted aisle, my long white train dragging behind, toward my Prince Charming who would be smiling back at me on the end...

One of our first decisions when Jim and I got engaged was where our wedding ceremony was going to be held. From my little memory above, you might think it was an obvious choice. Both Jim and I are Catholic, so at least religion isn't the difficult dilemma it can be for some couples. I had always told Jim that I wanted a church wedding and, if at all possible, at my church. 

Us having met and gradated from St. Francis, we dabbled a bit with holding our ceremony there. Being a Catholic university, they have an absolutely stunning chapel that graduates are welcome to be married in.

The historic Saint Joseph's Chapel in the Motherhouse at St. Francis

A couple that we met at St. Francis, Katrina Crone and Ryan Wolcott, are having both their wedding ceremony and reception at the university next June. I don't wanna say they beat us too it, but we decided around February that, although it holds a dear place in our hearts, St. Francis wasn't the place. I am, however, looking forward to Katrina and Ryan's wedding :)

Katrina and Ryan...awwww



So from there Jim and I thought about it, and we decided that my church, Saint Mary's in Mokena really would be the place :) I was absolutely thrilled! My family has been attending the church my entire life, and my dad's family has attended back into the 50's. My sister and I received all of my sacraments in this church, and it truly does hold a sentimental place in my heart :) 



My Church :)
Image taken from Life On Prints Photography



Father James Dvorscak will be marrying us. I love the way he speaks - very softly like he's always singing a lullaby. When Jim and I went to discuss our intentions with him, he sat Jim down and said "now, when she starts acting crazy with this wedding stuff - just shut up...she's always right".... :) He also took us back to the place I was baptized, which is now an office. The church you see about was opened a few months after my baptism in 1987. Like I said, I love this church :)

{The Date}

Deciding on a date was a decision we made around the same time we chose my church as the ceremony site. At first we were absolutely set on the last weekend of September 2012. It was the weekend that we had first attended our college homecoming together - not yet as a couple, but our relationship began soon after. However, another couple we met at St. Francis, Lacey Petrella and Chris "Shades" Zitko, had already claimed the end of September for their own wedding.



Lacey and Chris...awww



So, instead of clashing with our friends, Jim and I decided to re-evaluate our date. First, we did it the practical way - since Jim and I are being modern about this and are covering the majority of the wedding/reception/honeymoon costs on our own, we made a budget of how much we could save each month and wrote out the month to month difference from May -November 2012.

August just felt right :) And we had first met in August, so we stuck to it. As far as the day, we wanted a Saturday - more expensive than Friday, but we decided we just wanted the convenience for our family and friends. Jim was actually the one who chose our date...the 22nd had always been our day of the month - we started dating on the 22nd of October, we got engaged on the 22nd January and celebrated countless "monthaversaries" on the 22nd of every month - but, he said, this was our wedding...2 becoming 1. And that's why he said the 11th was perfect :) Because it's half of 22..clever, right? So our wedding day is Saturday August 11th, 2012.

{No's}

As far as the actual ceremony, we both decided that we're going to keep it very traditional. We won't have a unity candle or be mixing sand. Father Dvorscak actually explained that the origin of the unity candle is from the Wicca religion. If the candle doesn't light, it's supposed to foreshadow an unfaithful spouse who will have their life force (and he paused for dramatic effect)...snuffed out.



We are NOT having our wedding recorded...neither of us can really see each other sitting down to watch it...and it's expensive. I'm not trying to sound cheap, but we'd literally be paying $1,000+ for a movie we might watch twice. I wouldn't pay that much for ANY movie. We'll have the photo's, my dress, and...each other, haha, and that's good enough for me to remember I'm married to Jim! :)

{Yes's}



Our friends, Megan and David Murray (who we ALSO met at St. Francis) exchanging vows last July. I'm so excited that they will be walking down the aisle as bridesmaid and groomsman at our wedding :)

We are using classic vows...the same our parents (and our friends!) have said to each other on their wedding day. And I believe there is a traditional elegance to that. And yes, this is going to be the full, hour long mass..so be prepared, haha.



We're having ceremony programs...I don't know how exactly I want them to look, but that's why I have graphic designers to consult :)

And, of course...

Adorable ring bearer #1 : My little cousin Joey :)



Adorable ring bearer #2 : My little cousin Alex :)

Kylie, the daughter of Jim's childhood friend, Lauren, will be our beautiful flower girl :)

Don't you just want to squeeze them all?! Too adorable :)



Be Our Guest, Be Our Guest!

One warm night during orientation, Jim asked if I wanted to leave campus and go out to celebrate his roommate, Nick's, birthday. I gleefully said yes and was promptly squished into the back of Jen's car, thoroughly elated with the excitement that comes from meeting new people and experiencing the freedom of college for the first time. We chatted idly as Jen skillfully navigated the streets of downtown Joliet, until I felt the car slow down and turn into the tiny parking lot of what appeared to be a  little greasy-spoon diner. As I stepped out of the car, my suspicion was confirmed by a glowing neon sign spelling out the words "Hot Skillet".

The waitress seated us in the far left corner booth where the rest of the group, including the birthday boy, was already waiting. Jim slid next to me as we continued discussing our majors, relationships, and lives in general. Of course, the usual question came out - why St. Francis? Jim flashed that great smile of his and explained his decision to attend St. Francis was only made at the very last second. Completely set to begin classes at Eastern Illinois University, he took a chance visit to St. Francis and fell in love with the smaller - MUCH smaller - historical campus. So, leaving several Brother Rice classmates in the dust, he pulled out of Eastern and put his paper work in for fall '04 attendance at USF as a math education major...which had recently changed to mass communications. As we continued talking, I couldn't help but sense that he was opposite of me in every way. Math? Mass communication? Changing your mind? Haha, torture devices maybe. Even so, I was intrigued with him. Not yet as a potential boyfriend - no, no. Just as a person. I could feel myself getting softly pulled in by his aura, like floating along a gentle river current that, although you could, is just too comforting to swim against.

People in our group began ordering their food - we had yet to look over the menu. I began to glance through it when I heard Jim's voice say "How about this?". I turned to see what he was pointing to and read the words "chocolate soda". Startled by this oddity, all I could do was laugh and say "sure". However, because we weren't sure if it would be any good, we decided to split it - 2 straws and all. And you know what? It was pretty darn good.

Two years later, in October of 2007, when we first began officially dating, we would revisit Hot Skillet only to be seated in that very same booth where we shared the chocolate soda 2 years earlier. And yes, we definitely ordered another one.

This is what I consider our first ever meal together. Pretty unique, right? I mean, it's not everyday you run across a restaurant that serves chocolate sodas, let alone you have the gumption to order one. Like the combination of chocolate and soda, Jim and I may have seemed a little unlikely perhaps in the beginning, but when we finally decided to go for it, we became something pretty darn good...better than that, something amazing. And it didn't take long to learn that we're not so much opposites as compliments. Qualities I tend to lack are made up through him and vice versa. Most importantly, we have the same goals in life and are working together to accomplish them. And isn't that what a partnership and marriage is all about? Well, that and undying love :)


A chocolate soda may have been our first meal together as new acquaintances, but our first meal together as husband and wife is going to be a little bit fancier. Obviously, amazing food was a must-have when exploring possible halls, and boy did we find it at Riviera Country Club in Orland Park. My mom, Toni, and I stopped by their hall sort of randomly one day just to check it out. I was so impressed with their package that Jim and I did a tasting that weekend and we booked it on the spot! We want all of our guests to feel like Bell during the dinner scene of Beauty and the Beast (Disney girl here!) and...well, be our guest! So, all I have to say is be hungry. The cocktail hour will begin at 6:30 outside by the gazebo (weather permitting - fingers crossed!). Hors d'oeuvres and champagne will be served...and of course an open bar for those who prefer other drinks. 

It will be all lit up at night - won't that be beautiful?!

Dinner and toasting begin at 7:30 when the main meal will be served. We went with plated steak and chicken breast with all the normal stuff (bread, salad, soup, sides). It was sooo good (I'm hungry now just thinking about it!) and the plate was PACKED!

Our room! I want to spice it up with some color, but this is our blank slate :)



A picture of the room a little more dressed up.



I'm still thinking of different ways to decorate the tables, but I'm sure that will come together once I chose a color scheme, haha. I love too many colors.. But I'm definitely looking forward to the day when Jim and I step foot into this hall to share our first meal, our first dance, our first day as husband and wife :)

And I Thought I Loved You Then

In August 2005 I was gearing up to begin my freshman year of college at the University of Saint Francis. Now by this point in the summer I had become acustomed to receiving mail from the university...tons of it. All the financial aid forms, scholarship letters, and registration information became a blurred stack of stress piling on my desk. But through all of this madness there was one item that I remember opening in detail. It was a small card with the university emblem on one side and - in true romantic fashion, might I add - a hand written letter on the other. The words scrawled out in purple ink kindly and simply welcomed me to the university and the honors program. It was signed "Jim Grady", who I was to contact with any questions, needs, or concerns about college life. I found it rather sweet in comparison to the stack of cold forms I had sitting across from me. I showed the note to Toni, who started laughing at the purple color ink and the handwritting. So, instead of tossing it out with so much of the other "welcome" mail, I placed it in my bookcase where it would sit for another 2 years and 2 months.

A few weeks later I was moving in for freshman orientation. Although I wasn't living on campus, I had a room for my 2 week orientation. I remember the bright blue summer sky and the quiet of the campus, so different from the busy open houses I had attended. While moving in I ran into my cousin, Danielle, and her friend Jen who were a year ahead of me and they helped me drag my stuff into the dorms. We chatted about college life and their own memories of freshman orientation, while making introductions to anyone they knew along the way. 

After making several trips back and forth across campus, a moment came that Jim and I both remember perfectly. Like so many life changing moments it happened quietly and only seems booming, earth shattering...momentous in retrospect. Jen and I were standing by the elevator in the Marion Hall lobby when she shouted over to the group of people who had been hovering around the front desk since I had arrived. In that moment she could have introduced me to 100 other people, but the only person that stands out in my mind is Jim. Maybe it was his long wild hair, or the Wicked baseball cap trying to contain it, but this meeting is burned into my memory. Jen introduced me as "Danielle's cousin", but he was "Jim". Not yet "My Jim", but "Wise Sophomore Jim", who I began running into again...and again....and again over orientation. 

This is how the story of Jim and I met. Believe me, the story gets better, and our story is something that I honestly treasure as much as what our relationship has grown to become over the past 6 years. I can truthfully say that not once - not a single time - did our relationship weaken, did we have doubts, have we questioned whether or not we should be together. In a world full of so much uncertainty, he has always been my constant, my rock, and a true compliment to who I am as a person. I only hope I've been as extraordinary a partner to him as he has been to me. But, I guess I have the rest of my life to prove myself worthy! It's like that song by Brad Paisley...and I thought I loved you then. That's how I feel :)

So, because I love our story so much, I have been inspired to do something special for our save-the-dates and incorporate our story into them. Here's what I'm thinking...

or something similar to this...

My sister aka maid of honor is a graphic design/illustration major and one of Jim's close friends/groomsmen is also a graphic designer, so I'll be working with them to create something special and affordable. I already wrote the story and have a layout in mind. When I showed it to Jim he literally started tearing up so I think I got it right ;)